Are affairs ever forgiveable?
Friday, July 30, 2010 at 2:00PM Question from a reader:
"I had an affair once. We were very young and our marriage had just started to tank. He didnt want to have sex with me because we had just had our son and he said he coudnt see me as a sexual person anymore. He was in the delivery room with me and I guess he was kind of freaked out. But I think it was more about him being tired, stressed, and feeling like he was at the bottom of the list of my priorities. Well, guess what? I felt left out too. Here I was a new mom, and he wasnt even touching me. Then I met 'Bob' and he made me feel sexy and alive again. Bob and I met for a few months and I got my mojo back. I felt sexy and young and like someone wanted me. I didnt leave my husband. I survived it. And my husband started looking at me differently. I would get dressed at night, put makeup on and look at myself in the mirror and think 'I am HOT' no matter what he thinks' and I think he sort of started seeing me that way again. I think my affair saved my marriage. When my husband started to want to have sex again, I ended it with Bob. I am still grateful to Bob for what happened with us. I will be forever. And I dont think it was wrong, because it enable me to stay married to my husband, who I love. I will never tell him. Because he could never forgive me. But in my heart I know it was forgiveable. What do you think, Dr Nelson?"
